Office Hours #3!  An abbreviated edition.

- Angel is still an awesome show, after all this time. Better than Heroes. I’m putting it back into a shared spot at #2 on my top list.

- Don’t ask me what else is on that list, because I don’t know. Lost is #1, everything else is a runner up. And second place is first loser, britches!

- This looks like a good book too! Maybe I’ll keep up this trend of linking to the NY Times book review. Keep you suckers literate.

- This is hilarious quote from the review: "Along the way, Grann examines dozens of subjects that seem more and more mythical, suggesting a kind of magical non­fiction — the myth of the white Indian, for example, the fate of explorers who vanished searching for Fawcett, the habits of carnivorous fish, some which latch on to and live off the holiest, most tender of human organs."

- THE HOLIEST OF HOLIES

- As to the question I posed last week, regarding what you would do if you woke up tomorrow morning and had uncontrollable superhuman strength, no one bit. Well, one person bit via the internet relay chat, but he didn’t follow through with the question: he said he’d begin hurling cars at members of a particular special interest group he isn’t fond of. But what then? What then?

- For me, incredible strength isn’t something I’d exactly benefit from. My first reaction to being able to do stuff like that would probably be to test the limits of it (though not necessarily by hurling cars). After the initial rush wears off, though, you have to attempt to understand the consequences of this kind of ability: does it effect my metabolism? Does strength also imply speed and agility? Does it also mean I can’t be injured? If no, then has my healing process been altered at all? Stuff like that. Because if you need to eat your weight in protein every day to maintain that kind of muscle, well, that’s an edit to the family budget I don’t think Mrs. Detroit is going to be fond of. In addition to learning the physiological ramifications of this, I (and you) would have to learn how to manage this deviance. If you’re the only person in the world with superhuman strength, and you’re found out, odds are you’re going to be whisked away to Area 51 Gitmo M.I.T. somewhere likely unpleasant for questioning and observation. So the question becomes, how do you control the uncontrollable? And how you answer that in your own particular case isn’t a question I can answer right now.

- THINK ON IT.

- Another user on the forums asked the question I intended to start this game off with, which is what would you do if right now, as you’re reading this, the news broke that the recently dead were coming to life and killing people — and that the people they killed, got up and killed? And the zombie survival guide doesn’t count, because while I haven’t read it, I don’t imagine it takes into consideration the fact that any thinking person would be scared to death at the prospect and not man up into some kind of chainsaw wielding alcohol fueled anti-hero, a hard-boiled hardass who’d kill his own mother if she got bit, which is what most people like to think they’d do. Everyone thinks they’re Ben, but most people are Harry or whatever the guy in the basement’s name is. In other words, most people are going to be selfish and full of it in this situation. So, what would you do? And then what? And then what?

- I spent the last day or so watching Wrestlemania 7. That’s the first wrestling tape I ever owned. It’s a lot better than I remember it being, which should come as no surprise. Rockers-Haku & The Barbarian, Hart Foundation-Nasty Boys, and of course the infinitely epic Savage-Warrior retirement match. Gonna polish it off tonight (I left off in the middle of the Mr. Perfect-Big Boss Man IC title match), and then move onto something else.

- This is an abbreviated column this week, since I have actual work to do during my office hours, so…peace!

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