Posted on December 20th, 2008 in Axel Night, Flashback, NES, Video Games by Axel Night

The "." means "don’t sue us!"

System: Nintendo Entertainment System
Year: 1988
Company: Capcom
Genre: Forced Scrolling Shooter

Townsfolk like to stand in the middle of the desert amidst gunfights in hopes of selling you stuff.

The Wild West is a dangerous place, especially the town of Hicksville.  Why?  The Wingate Gang is in town, and with their posse of troublemakers, you’ll be up to your completely heterosexual chaps in blazing lead.

Luckily, strapped on to your pelvis are a pair of mighty hand-pieces, blowing their load from their mighty shafts as you penetrate wave after wave of men in fast-paced, sweaty, intense action!  In a very manly, lady-loving fashion, I mean.

Before you can bang the Wingate Gang, you’ll need to take a train of costumed cowfolk bosses ranging from an angry Native American, to a bald razor-boomerang thrower, to a fat guy with a gatling gun, to a ninja.  Yup, a ninja.  Before you can face a boss, you have to find or buy their wanted poster, else you’ll just be run through the level over and over until you man up and do it.

Your guns can fire straight ahead, or swing slightly to either side, but if one of these bandits come at you from behind, you can only move or take it hard.  One hit kills, I mean.  That is unless you find and mount your horse, who will take it for you.

The game is a classic, and if you’re looking for a quicky, the NES version is a great way to go, but if you want the longer and harder arcade experience, it’s available on at least a few Capcom compilations for PS2, X-Box, PC and whatever else.  It’s at least as fun as having another guy toss your salad.  I mean… Damn it.

 

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