Posted on October 24th, 2008 in A Horror A Day, Brick Prior, Movies by Brick Prior

They say the best things in life are free, which is why I’m doing this for no money at all.  That’s right- it’s Day #24 of A Horror A Day, and today… well…

It’s Italian.

Again. 

TODAY’S FILM: Cemetery Man

Previously doomed to a life of being bootlegged on the convention circuit and shoddy tape trading, this one finally had a legit American DVD release in 2006 and it was certainly worth the wait.

Actually, that’s me in hype mode.  Here’s the trailer!

THE TRAILER


THE RECAP, BRICK PRIOR STYLE

It’s funny how hype skewers our view of things- stop me if you’ve heard this one before.  There’s a movie coming out or has been out for a while that everyone raves and rants about like it’s the best thing ever.  You haven’t seen it, but really want to… and when the day finally comes, you can’t help but feel a little disappointed that the experience wasn’t what everyone was saying it was.

Fact of the matter is, if we say something’s awesome or great or even slightly good, there’s always gonna be someone around the corner to say, "Really? I didn’t really like it".  If you’re lucky, they’ll actually be able to validate their opinion rather than giving different versions of "I thought it was STUPID!" as their overall reasoning, but that’s besides the point.

Anyway, there’s hype.  Remember how I said the movie was worth the wait, and then you watched the trailer and went, "Ehhh.  Looks dumb.  Brick is stupid"?

That’s how hype works more often than not.

Let me continue.

Fact of the matter is, Cemetery Man (or Dellamorte Dellamore as it’s originally known) isn’t your typical zombie movie.   This isn’t due to the fact that it stars Rupert Everret, but is more or less because of it’s approach to the zombie genre.  While it, like every other zombie movie, is a bit of a rumination on the subject of life and death, this movie has one other big factor going for it:

It’s a love story.

Our hero Francesco spends his days burying corpses and waiting seven days for them to rise up so he can shoot them in the head.  He has nothing going for him outside of his work, and the only interaction he has is with his assistant Gnaghi, who’s a large mentally deficient man who pretty much lives to serve… although he does have an eye on the mayor’s daughter.  The two are good at their jobs- they bury folks… and then bury them again.  It’s a meager existence that gets shaken up something fierce when a widow comes to bury her husband.  Francesco falls in love, but loses himself in the moment (read: do not hump women in a graveyard when corpses are digging themselves up nightly- it will not end well) and she ends up in the ground.

Of course, she comes back and gets a bullet in the head… but there’s the pesky fact that she didn’t die originally that’s got Francesco all in a tizzy… which is the perfect opportunity for him to keep falling in love with women that look just like the widow, and he starts to lose what little grip on his sanity he had left.

Meanwhile, Gnaghi has to bury the mayor’s daughter, and due to a need to have some sort of companionship with someone other than Francesco, keeps her severed head in a TV set.  They hold conversations.  It’s pretty much the most touching thing I’ve ever seen in a zombie film, which makes the end of that relationship pretty tragic (yes, it’s another case of "bullet in the  brainpan, squish").

So, our protagonists go about their business- one’s probably going mad, and one’s pretty alone.

How’s it end?

One word: snow.  Six more: possibly the end of the world.  Three that might be a hook for something that happened earlier in the film: zombie boy scouts.

Even if you hated the trailer, it’s worth a look

BRICK’S FINAL THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Definitely a fun film; more fantasy based then pure horror, but due to the zombies, it’s worth a place on this list.  It’s been a highlight of this month, that’s for sure.

TOMORROW

Wicked City!
  TENTACLE BEAST MAN RETURNS!

What are people saying about "A Horror A Day"?

Brick Prior
Re: A Horror A Day

Day 2!
DrDetroit
Re: A Horror A Day

I enjoy A Horror A Day!
Brick Prior
Re: A Horror A Day

I'm happy that you enjoy it!  Here is Day 3!
Brick Prior
Re: A Horror A Day

It's like the fate of the world depends on me!  Day 4!
DrDetroit
Re: A Horror A Day

This is awesome.  This is making me want to bust out some old zombie movies and take a mental health day.  Maybe next week!

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