AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP
Posted on June 27th, 2008 in AbG FACEOFF!, Axel Night by Axel Night
I must admit, Axel has been playing some World of Warcraft. Axel apologizes. Mostly to himself. Through it, I have learned that people amaze me. I thought I understood the basic concepts of balance. These people have shown me the err of my ways. And then I realized the problem. A basic question goes unanswered. Sure, we have been told all our lives how the triangle works. It balances the world. But, we couldn’t help but feel lied to. Without seeing the battle before our eyes, we can not completely accept it. And so, to answer our age-old doubt, the oldest in battle characters are allowed into the AbG ring to settle their dominance once and for all…
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ROCK Weighing in at 5.9736×1024 kilograms, give or take 1.4 × 1021 kilograms of water weight, Rock has shown time and time again that it can best Scissors. Best of three match, ladder match, hardcore rules, Rock has won them all. The people love The Rock. Accept no substitutes that may be trying to use Rock’s name without his permission. Use only officially licensed Rock. But, for years, Rock has lived in the shadow of Paper. How could something so thin, so fragile, possibly beat the igneous, sedimentary, and metamorphic power that is Rock? |
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VS.
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PAPER It may look like a light weight, but ask any lawyer, there’s no opponent it can’t outsmart. Paper is always on top, sinking its roots in all over the world. It’s all about tactics with Paper, and it can cover just about anyone for the three-count. Rock may be steady and strong, but paper is always coming up fast. In the US alone, 400 million miles of toilet paper are used each year. The earth’s circumference is only about 24,900 miles around, and if you ignore that it’s about two-thirds water, that still lets it circle the globe about 16,000 times. How could Paper not have Rock under wraps? |
What are people saying about "AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP"?
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Sasha Kenzan Re: AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP Put Rock & Paper in the octagon.. rock wins. All Rock has to do is just sit there. Paper will decompose after a while. The only chance Paper has is to fold it self into a paper airplane & fly away from the rock. |
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DrDetroit Re: AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP G.O.B.: You planned this all out, didn’t you, Michael? Michael: No, I didn’t. I had no crew. I had no time. G.O.B.: You set me up. Narrator: G.O.B. charged at Michael with the scissors, but Michael, Michael: Put it down. Narrator: as he always did, picked rock... G.O.B.: Make it collapse. Make me look foolish. Michael: G.O.B., don’t do this. G.O.B., the scissors! Narrator: ...which beat scissors. |
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DrDetroit Re: AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP I realize the above post is about paper v. scissors, but it is the only appropriate response I could think of. |
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Architect of Awesome Re: AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP I'm gonna side with Brick on this one. Paper cuts suck. I'd rather be on paper's good side. |
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BlinderGuardian Re: AbG FACEOFF! #9: RvP Paper, not only does it traditionally beat a rock but it does so in practice as well. A bigger rock can be drawn on it, or better yet, the president may write on said paper the decree for a tactical assault on the sedimentary bastard. |
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